A Place to die

 A Poisoned Chalice

I was going to say, I've not tried my hand at Medieval Fantasy.

The truth is I did, several years ago, and like everything I write; it died a death of a thousand blows. 

The Poisoned Chalice could desribe my mentality at the moment.

When the bleakness of depression seeps into your soul, only a miracle can bring you into the light.

Unfortunately, after figthing for over a decade to climb out; I have given up the struggle. What is the point of fighting  something which nas no will to live, other than to destroy your faith?

The miracle I hoped for was some ebook sales, but as a self-published author, I was fighting against the odds from the start. In the end, even a punch-drunk boxer realises he's lost the fight.

If you haven't heard the term punch-drunk, it means to go for the sake of fighting, like Rocky did in Rocky 3. You know you've lost, but you are so beaten you won't give up.