Thursday, 24 September 2015

Damn right, Skippy

Damn right, Skippy

Never give a mug an even break

 The quote at the top comes from Matt Frewer's character "Tag" in the series A town called Eureka. This phrase links well with the one below the picture from 1920's comedian W.C.Fields. The combination of the phrases epitomises the last year in my life. 

Last year, my mother died, and I gave my small inheritance to the family to ease our money problems. The final £1,000 I gave to my stepson, to try and make him feel part of the family.

I knew I needed that money to replace my old laptop, get AV software for the laptop, and to get covers for my e-books but I gave the money away.

A year on, I have given up on replacing my old laptop. My bank account got hacked because I couldn't spare £40 for the Anti-virus update, and I have to use my old photos for covers.

I could make more money writing, but I can't afford covers, and I dislike taking favours from kind friends, as I know I'll never be able to repay the kindness. Unlike some people, my moral code finds it hard to accept gifts, knowing I cannot repay the kindness, this trait causes me endless despair.

My moral code also forbids me from writing about things I find deplorable. That is why in 2012, I turned down a contract opportunity to write for Hony Devil Publishing. HD ethics turned my stomach; I used to write erotic romances that included steamy/rough sex scenes, but at all times the root of the love was respecting the other person. I couldn't write stories akin to 50 Shades of Gray.

Never a day goes by when I don't ask why did I do it? Never a day goes by when I regret my act of kindness. I know I'll never get my covers; or my laptop and yes, I do wish I could turn the clock back to the day I made the choice. But, hindsight is wonderful if we had it permanently.

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